I'm still here in purgatory waiting a decision on my future killing the time living in the past.
I remember the day I was walking in the park minding my own business, smelling the spring in the air and happily urinating. What a wonderful morning it was until I've seen something very agitating. I saw a dog running around with a stick in his mouth... how unstylish it was. If you ask any dog why does he doing that, he couldn't tell you , but he 's still going to catch a freakin' stick if you throw it. If you want me to tell you the secret of the stick I must be sure that no one dog will ever hear a word of it. You promise?
Well, I have to go back to the ancient era again and remind of time spent with my first female. As you already know, she had a very bad temper, but it wasn't all... she was jealous as well, an just couldn't shut her mouth. All the days I had to listen her barking...
-"Rex"- I've heard her barking - "You're such a bastard. Stop hanging around that mammoth girl all the time."
- "What freakin' mammoth girl my dear? - I asked - "I was farting around a little, and hanging up with Jimmy the skunk. He showed me some great tricks"
-"Don't make a fool of me, idiot. I saw the way you're looking her."
-"You're absolutely crazy and in delusion. She's a mammoth, and I'm a dog... She's a hundred times bigger then me. What's messed up in your mind?"
-"I'm a thousand times bigger then a flea, and it doesn't stop it to bite me. Cut the crap. Why don't you go to clean the kitchen or something..."
I was surprised.
-"But... we don't have a kitchen."
-"Excuses... stop making freakin' excuses all the time! Why can't you just do what I've asked you to?
-"You're absolutely crazy and in delusion. She's a mammoth, and I'm a dog... She's a hundred times bigger then me. What's messed up in your mind?"
-"I'm a thousand times bigger then a flea, and it doesn't stop it to bite me. Cut the crap. Why don't you go to clean the kitchen or something..."
I was surprised.
-"But... we don't have a kitchen."
-"Excuses... stop making freakin' excuses all the time! Why can't you just do what I've asked you to?
... I needed a rest, so I've found a stick , took it and put it in her mouth. Every day I was putting that stick back until she's started taking it by herself. Those were the peaceful days...
I've never thought that she will implement her bad habits into genetic code and transfer it to the next generations. How foolish I was. And after all I was accused for family abuse...
14:35
Did you really put a stick in your girlfriends mouth? And did she shut up when you did it? Do you know why the dog cant tell you why it has a stick in his mouth? Because it cant talk with a stick in his mouth :)
14:06
Come on Mr. Poo, did you ever hear a dog talking? Thanks for comment mate.
15:49
This is too funny. I love animals.
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