Dog's revelation
Everybody think that's simple to be a dog. I'm not just another dog. I'm Rex, Mr. Rex, and I'm going to show you how hard a dog's life can be.

Welcome to my funny weblog. The history is written by the winners so nobody is going to tell you funny and spicy things that contributed to their victories. The real fun is to reveil the truth about the past times and all those funny things that no one dare to tell. While I'm waiting to be reborn, I'm spending my time sharing my memories with you. Hope you'll have fun.

6. Smuggler's blues

Oznake:


Few years later my dog's life finally has come to the end. What happened after death I can't remember, but I can recall one fragment where I was bagging for another chance, but no one did not care. That's pissing dog's soul, they used to say, and his weapon runs dry now. How humiliated I was...
And one day I saw the sun again...Only a ray of it, but it still was ok. I came to this world in some kind of a wooden structure, surrounded by some people and a great number of animals. My mom have told me to be quiet, not to run around , not to bark and not to fart  because we were aboard the ship of Noah The Smuggler. Noah was a gray haired man, old about five hundred years or more, drunk, with no sense of humor at all. I've heard he was smuggling some kind of forbidden home-made brandy and wine to the distant provinces, animals for the other town's zoo, and some kind of drug he called the crack.
One day I was laying scared in my box, eating my own shit and listening the sounds of the waves. Suddenly I've seen that something was happening among the cows.  I came closer , curious as I was, and see a bull jumping on a black cow. I was watching the scene for some time, and then run to my mother excited.
- "Mom, mom... I was watching how bull f*cks a black cow..."
- "Watch your language ,Rex" - my mom was upset - "If you want to tell me about it ,you can use some different words. For example...surprised. How the bull surprised the black cow."
- "Sorry mom" - I said - "Won't happen again."
- "Ok now. You can go to play, and try not to be that loud. Noah will throw you off the Ark."
I came back to watch the scene with the cows. All the animals were quiet, minding their own business, just the bull and the cows had their own party. I was so excited, so I had to tell all to my mother.
- "Mom...mom" - I run to her again 
- "What's now Rex?" - she asked
- "I have to tell you how the bull has surprised a white cow."
- "So tell me dear. It seems like I have to hear it anyway." - Mother was indifferent.
- "He f*cks only the black one" - I've started to laugh, but she didn't feel like laughing, so I was grounded for the rest of a day.
Until I've heard a voice that seemed so familiar to me...
- "Noah, stop all of your activities for the goodness of mankind!" - The voice sad
Whose that voice was, I thought. That must be someone I know. Ive heard that voice for many times.
-"This is my last warning, Noah. Let all those animals free and quit your business or I'll stop it for you."
I still could not recognize who was speaking, so I finally barked.
-"Shut up Rex"- he said - "I've already had enough of you for the last few centuries. You have made me enough problems."
Oh, no I recognized him. That was God, and he was still angry with me.
-"So, what did you decide, Noah?"
-"No, God" - said Noah -"I was working hard to run my business , to establish my company, and nobody, even you, my god, can't take it away from me."
Than God raised the waves and wind, the clouds darkened the sky and hard rain started to fall, but Noah's ship was unsinkable.
- " Oh God, don't you try to beat me. I'm Noah The Smuggler, the greatest captain and ship constructor. I've made this Ark all by myself to resist the greatest tribulations. I'll keep running my business whatever it takes."
-"Alright, Noah, you won"- said God. - "I don't want to waste my time on you any more. I'll let you keep your ship. You can even keep your production and your business..."
Than God clapped his hands and so the Flood came, and all life was extinguished, except for those who were with Noah, and the waters prevailed upon the earth for one-hundred and fifty days.
-"...but you have to find some new customers." - said God and returned back to Heaven.
That's the real story of deluge, but Noah was one of some rare survivors, and his story was a little bit different, but that's why I am here...to reveal the truth.

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